I just want to say Thanks for taking the time to read my blog. I am not very good with words, and I am a horrible speller. But I will tell you this, I will be writing from the Heart. Being overweight has been me my whole life. I have covered it up many times, and very little to I talk about my honest feelings about obesity. Many are thinking where did this come from? I am participating in a contest hosted by Lehi City, "Slim to Win" (set-up like biggest loser). It starts on Saturday and goes until August 4, 2012. Six months, I will be striving to live a healthier life and drop a few pounds on the way. (115 pounds is my goal) Again, all of my words will be from my heart! I would 1st like to share the paper I wrote for the judges. It reads the following:
I am from Lehi, born and raised. I love Lehi and have had a wonderful life growing up here and being involved in my community. However, it has not always been easy! As a young girl I was always the biggest one of my friends. I have been called fat, lardo, chunky, chubby, overweight, big boned, a whale etc. I learned at a young age that kids can be very mean! In my childhood, I spent hours crying because I was fat and then I would turn to food to make me feel better. I quickly learned that I needed to have a LARGE personality to help others see passed my large body. Once, while living in NYC, a man at a stand in central park wouldn’t sell me a pretzel because I didn’t need it. It hurt! No matter how old I get, it always hurts!
While I was developing my large personality for others to like me, I quickly discovered that if others have what they want, they are happy. When they are happy, they are nice. I then became a person who was always seeking out ways I can serve others. I would do whatever they needed to help them out. I loved this, I felt good and others liked me! This was it, the way that I would mask myself. After years of doing this I am exhausted and still do not feel completely fulfilled. I know it’s time for a change!
You are probably wondering why I never did anything about it before. I did, I tried--
but eventually just fell back into old habits. I love the gym, but I feel guilty about giving up time with my family to take time for me. I lost some weight doing Weight Watchers and working-out but for one reason or another I gave up. This is my time to do it!
My husband and I have been married for a short time and would like to have children together. When we were married, I was lucky to gain 4 children and I am very grateful to have full-custody of them. We all want to add on to our family. My doctor has put me on medication that would help us but it has been a struggle. So far, we have not had a successful pregnancy. My doctor has told me over and over if I lost weight that would help a lot.
I need to be healthy for my sake and the sake of my children! I don’t ever want them to feel like they can’t do something in life because of their size, like me. I want to go to water parks, take my kids to amusement parks and not worry about whether I will fit in the seat or not. I want to hike, bike ride, and roller blade with my family. These things seem so simple but to someone who weighs 335 pounds, they are impossible.
My body is wearing down. I am only 33 years old and I need to have a nap everyday to make it through the day. Sleep has been a struggle. Because of my weight, if I sleep on my side my hands fall asleep quickly causing me to wake up in pain.
I want to be involved in this contest. I am sure if I was selected there will be many tears, sore body parts and a lot of questioning “Why did I do this?!” But I am ready to get the help and support I need to do hard things and I know I will be a committed contestant. I know it will be hard, but I know that it will give me the help I need to lose weight, educate me on how to be healthy and it will help me teach my children to be healthy as well. I feel that I deserve a chance to be a constant for “Slim to Win” contest because it’s MY time! I have been serving and caring for everyone else around me. I deserve to be healthy, happy and be able to enjoy my family.
I will write more, I also have some before pictures that I will post. (I am not sure if I am ready for that yet)
